What I relay to you is a true story of a young couple. It was told as a matter or confession, not to a priest, but to any who would listen. I don’t feel the necessity to identify the couple, as this could be any couple in modern society.
This young man was seeing a young lady, and their attractions grew to one another as often young people do. They were both working and soon decided that it would be best to move in with one another and therefore save on some of the costs of living. This would make things financially better for the both of them, plus there would be other “fringe benefits”.
The young man admitted he was self-centered and was concerned more about having freed up money to have a good time and to have the benefit of sexual pleasures at will. He wasn’t concerned about taking precautions to avoid pregnancy; that was her problem, not his. He remember how great it was to be living with her indulging one another’s fantasies without regard to God or anyone else. Until she got pregnant.
The pregnancy alarm “slapped him in the face”, as he put it. They were both shocked and caught off guard. Suddenly life stopped for them. All of their future plans, their relationship, and collage would all have to change. He remembered thinking that his whole life was suddenly snatched from him with the realization of this permanent change. He regretted his foolish arrogance and disregard for not avoiding this predicament by listening to his parents warnings. He was scared. She asked what to do. He lined up the options: marriage, bail on her, abortion, or just ignore it.
She wanted marriage and to keep the baby, but he wasn’t ready, so he just pushed her away ignoring the issue. She moved in with another friend but still sought his advice. He wouldn’t return her calls. In fear and desperation she scheduled an abortion.
When he found out his heart was sickened. Guilt flooded over his whole mental and emotional state. He was shamed that he had failed her and the baby. He wanted to tell her not to go through with it. But his cowardice had left him unable to move, he had forsook his responsibilities and left the burden to his girlfriend. Eventually he mustered up the strength to accompany his girlfriend to the clinic.
When he walked in there were others like him waiting with their family members. He could feel their eyes on him. He knew that they knew that he was the father of the baby that was being aborted. He was murdering his own child. He was sacrificing his own baby for what he perceived would be a better lifestyle for himself. He knew that his girlfriend was struggling. She want to keep the baby, but was afraid that without his support it would not be possible. She thought that he loved her. She realizes now, too late, that he loved himself more.
The abortion was quick. After the abortion she left with other friends who had come to support her. He left all alone. They never spoke again. The guild and shame of the murderous act had destroyed their relationship. Decades later this time period of his life would still haunt him. Wondering what his child would have been like. Wondering what his marriage with this young lady could have been. How many memories did he forsake for his selfish act?
Later he married a Christian lady. He started going to church. He would here the pastor teach on how God said that children are an heritage of the Lord (Psalms 127:3-5). He read how scriptures like John 16:21 remarked on what a joy it is that a man can be born. He heard in Provers 17:6 where it said that Children’s children are the crown of old men; and they glory of children are their fathers. He felt such sorrow and remorse. He had missed out on those blessings. The blessings of seeing the birth of his baby. He missed out on the joys of running with a kite with his baby. He missed the times of teachings, like riding a bike, or driving a car. More than that he missed out on the joy of having his grandbabies sit on his lap. Unable to keep his façade up any longer. He spent hours confessing to his wife.
He confessed his selfishness to her. He relayed the shame of his cowardice avoidance of his responsibilities to his girlfriend and to his baby, and to God. In tears he poured out his regrets and a lifetime of torment that he has lived with all of those years. His wife took him in her arms and for two hours she told of the forgiveness available from God in Jesus Christ. He eventually pleaded his cas before God, and poured out his sorrows to him. He repented of his selfishness and lack of courage in doing what he knew was wrong. He confessed the murder of his own child.
He received forgiveness. He has reached out with the support of his wife and his church to the once young lady, who he had failed before. She too had spent a life time of dealing with the guilt and anguish that comes from the shameful act of murder we call abortion. She too has been redeemed by Jesus Christ.
It is a terrible thing when society and governments condone the murder of innocent babies. It is a terrible testimony to the state of a nation that prefers mothers to kill their babies for profits to be fed to special interest corporations. Surely they will be held accountable before Christ in the final judgement. So will the Christians who stop silently and watched this atrocity unfold before their eyes. Especially those who live in countries where they have the right to vote on such matters of conscience. It is not just those who need forgiveness. God forgive us all.